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Funny Football Jokes

Listed below is a collection of Funny Football Sports Jokes, Jokes about Football. has a large funny joke collection sorted by sport category

its half time on a wet and muddy saturday.the gunners hit the showers.arsene wenger walks in to give a pep talk and inspect the dressing room.he walks into the showers and find a huge turd on the floor.enraged he yells at the team."whos shit on the floor?" emile heskey shouts, back "thats me boss but im great in the air"
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  Who Are Ya? II
Coventry City, the only place in football where the PA announcer introduces the crowd to the players.
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  Who Are Ya?
A Coventry fan calls the club one Saturday morning, and asks: 'What time is kick off?' 'What time can you make it?' comes the reply.
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Last November a talented turkey was spotted playing football with a few mates. He was invited by a top team for a trial. You should have seen him, sprinting up the field, diving, swerving and scoring goals. The team trainer said he was the best he had seen in ages. He asked the turkey when he would like to start playing for the team. The turkey replied "Any time you want me, but please can I play the Boxing Day Match??"
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  wills meets wayne
prince william meets wayne rooney who has injured his foot. wills says to wayne; "i`ve met a wayne before, but i`ve never "metatarsal"
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  Bobby Moore
Bobby Moore is wandering around heaven minding his own business when an old man comes up to him and shakes his hand,'Bobby Bobby my hero, 1966 world cup, what a star', agitated Bobby pushes him away, 'Go away,go away, that's all everyone thinks about 1966,noone ever thinks of my career with West Ham. Bobby carries on wandering when an elderly Lady flings her arms around him and starts kissing him, 'Bobby More, 1966 world cup I love you Bobby.' 'No no go away, that's a;ll everyone remembers, I never wanted to be captain, go away'. Pretty soon a young lad comes up to him and slaps him on the back, 'Bobby Moore, my Grandfather was always talking about you, World cup winning Captain', Bobby storms off 'right I've had enough of 1966 and Englands World Cup winning captain, I did play for West Ham and win an F.A. Cup winners medal in 1964, but oh no no one remembers that, it always 1966 this and 1966 that, I know where I,m going.' Pretty soon he stumbles across a group of legendery players, Stanley Matthews, Billy Wright, Emlyn Hughes, George Best and Busbys Babies, he walks up to Duncan Edwards and smacks him straight in the eye, 'What did you do that for Bobby?'. Bobby replies 'That's for sitting at the back of the plane you bastard!'.
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