Football Jokes

Listed below is a collection of Funny Football Sports Jokes, Jokes about Football. SportsJokeCafe.com has a large funny joke collection sorted by sport category

Why dont you laugh at a liverpool fan on a bike? Because its probably your bike View Football Sports Joke

What Is Football Football consists of 22 men on the field desperately in need of a rest, and 40,000 in the stands desperately in need of exercise. View Football Sports Joke

The Magic Mirror Quasimodo is sat in his study and once again is feeling depressed about how ugly he is. Looking for some reassurance, he goes in search of Esmerelda. When he finds her he asks her once again if he really is the ugliest man alive. Esmerelda sighs and says "Look, why don't you go upstairs and ask the magic mirror who is the ugliest man alive? The mirror will answer your question once and for all" About five minutes later a very pleased looking Quasimodo bounced back back the stairs and gave Esmerelda a great big hug. "Well it worked" Quasmido beamed, "But who on earth is Iain Dowie?" View Football Sports Joke

A MESSY DIVORCE A couple in the middle of a messy divorce case find themselves in court battling over custody of little Johnny, their only child. In order to make a fair decision over the boys future, the Judge takes Johnny into his private chambers so that he can find out which of the parents the boy would prefer to live with. "Well, Johnny" says the Judge, "Would you like to live with your Mother?" "No" replied Johnny, "she hits me all the time" "Well then," the Judge continues, "Would you like to live your your Father?" "No" replied Johnny again, "He hits me all the time too!" The Judge looks exasperated and says to the boy "Well Johnny, who would you like to live with?" "I'd like to live with Watford Football Club" the boy replied quickly. "Why on earth would you want to live with the Watford Football Club?" replied the now extremely puzzled Judge. "Well" replied Johnny, "They never beat anyone" View Football Sports Joke

New Soccer Trick: Cavity Search funny photo of two football players on the field. View Football Sports Photo

Hungry Football Fans An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel. "Well," said the Englishman, "I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver." "I support the Hearts club," said the Scotsman, "so I'll eat the heart." "I support Arsenal," said the Irishman, "but I seem to have lost my appetite." View Football Sports Joke

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