Baseball Jokes

Listed below is a collection of Funny Baseball Sports Jokes, Jokes about Baseball. SportsJokeCafe.com has a large funny joke collection sorted by sport category

Devil vs Lord One Day the Devil challenged the Lord to a baseball game. Smiling the Lord proclaimed, "You don't have a chance, I have Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle, and all the greatest players up here". "Yes", snickered the devil, "but I have all the umpires." View Baseball Sports Joke

Michael Jackson Why does Michael Jackson like baseball games? Because he gets to see some balls. View Baseball Sports Joke

The First Pitch Baseball fans are hoping that President Clinton may throw out the first pitch at one of the World Series games. "Normally, we'd ask Hillary," said a baseball spokesman. "Because she seems to be the one with the balls." View Baseball Sports Joke

Sold Out Seats A Spaniard name Jose came to Miami and wanted to attend a big league game. To his dismay he found that all the seats were sold out. However, the management gave him a high seat by the flagpole. When he returned to his home country his friends asked him, "What kind of people are those Americans?" He said, "Fine people, they gave me a special seat at the ball game and just before the game started that all stood up and sang 'Jose can you see.'" View Baseball Sports Joke

Scotsmans first baseball game A recent Scottish immigrant attends his first baseball game in his new country and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring run....run! The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya!" A third batter slams a hit and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya!" The next batter held his swing at three and two and as the ump calls a walk the Scotsman stands up yelling "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run!" All the surrounding fans giggle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment whisper, "He doesn't have to run, he's got four balls." After this explanation the Scotsman stands up in disbelief and screams, "Walk with pr-r-ride man! Walk with pr-r-ride!!!!" View Baseball Sports Joke

The Doctor Patients A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the National Anthem started.......the doctor yelled, "Up Nuts" And the patients complied by standing up. After the anthem ...he yelled, "Down Nuts". And they all sat back down in their seats. After a home run was hit, the doctor yelled, "Cheer Nuts". They all brokeout into applause and cheered. When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of the home team, the Doctor yelled, "Booooo Nuts!!!" and they all started booing and cat calling. Thinking things were going very well. The doctor decided to go get a beer and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned, there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, the doctor asked," What in the world happened? " The assistant replied, "Well, everything was going just fine till a vendor passed by and yelled PEANUTS!" View Baseball Sports Joke

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